What in the world??????

Well, I'm sitting in Border's - my favorite spot to go when I want to focus on a project with minimal distraction ... meaning minus two little tornadoes name Tyler and Junior. It's easy to be inspired surrounded by limitless literature and caffeine. Normally.

Doesn't seem to be working today.

Backstory: I was selected by a best-selling author (No, not Zane) to contribute a short story for his anthology and I really wanted to start laying the foundation for that - think on characters, plot, location, etc.

I bought a cup of coffee, picked a quiet spot by the window, powered up the laptop.

And I was doing alright - mulling over some storylines, doing a bit of research, looking on line ..... you know, trying really hard to be focused on writing.

But then I had company. A ten year old boy asked for an autograph - damn those 50 foot WGCI billboards - and his mama wanted a little bit of conversation. I never mind that. But when they left, I decided to check a few of my online spots.

And that's where I got stuck.

There are sooo many interesting things to do and see while surfing the Internet.

Among other things ......

1. I watched a video on the ten emotional stages we go through to open a tightly sealed jar.

The 10 Stages of Opening a Jar

Add to My Profile | More Videos

2. I created a zwinky. Not quite as fun as Build-A-Bear but close. You be the judge:

or



I continued to be amazed at the unnecessary amount of flesh that is exposed on MySpace. I'll spare you an example of that.

I learned that of the ten most dangerous toys of 2006, my kid's have three. I will confiscate them today while they are napping. Click here and see if you are as bad of a parent as I am.

And I finally broke down and took a damn survey.

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:	Nikki Woods
Birthday:	June 23
Birthplace:	St. Louis
Current Location:	Chicago
Eye Color:	Brown
Hair Color:	Brown
Height:	5'9
Right Handed or Left Handed:	Right
Your Heritage:	I'm a combination of a lot of things - just like everybody else.
The Shoes You Wore Today:	Black and Silver Nike's
Your Weakness:	The three men in my life - T, J, N
Your Fears:	Wasting Time
Your Perfect Pizza:	Pepperoni, Ground Beef, Onions on Thin Crust
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:	I'm doing exactly what I want to be doing
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:	lmao
Thoughts First Waking Up:	Is it 2:30 in the friggin' morning already?????????
Your Best Physical Feature:	My smile
Your Bedtime:	the same time as my children usually - ain't that sad?
Your Most Missed Memory:	sleeping in until noon
Pepsi or Coke:	Coke
MacDonalds or Burger King:	Neither
Single or Group Dates:	Who needs a crowd?
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:	Lipton ... my mama drinks it
Chocolate or Vanilla:	chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee:	plain old dunkin donuts coffee
Do you Smoke:	nope
Do you Swear:	make me mad and see
Do you Sing:	yes .... much to the annoyance of those around me
Do you Shower Daily:	few times a day
Have you Been in Love:	MADLY
Do you want to go to College:
Do you want to get Married:	yes
Do you belive in yourself:	if I don't - who will?????
Do you get Motion Sickness:	sometimes ...
Do you think you are Attractive:	I'm pretty cute
Are you a Health Freak:	no but I should be
Do you get along with your Parents:	They are my heroes
Do you like Thunderstorms:	if I'm not alone
Do you play an Instrument:	a couple of them ... not very well though
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:	I've had a sip or two ...
In the past month have you Smoked:	nope
In the past month have you been on Drugs:	legal ones .... alleve is my drug of choice
In the past month have you gone on a Date:	yes ... quite a few
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:	yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:	nope
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:	yes
In the past month have you been on Stage:	yes
In the past month have you been Dumped:	nope
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:	nope
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:	are you serious?
Ever been Drunk:	yep
Ever been called a Tease:	nope
Ever been Beaten up:	nope
Ever Shoplifted:	nope
How do you want to Die:	OLD
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:	still trying to figure it out
What country would you most like to Visit:	Spain
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color:	Doesn't really matter as long as they see out of them
Favourite Hair Color:	Brown or black
Short or Long Hair:	Short
Height:	over 6'2
Weight:	'bout 220
Best Clothing Style:	his own
Number of Drugs I have taken:	a lot of legal ones
Number of CDs I own:	don't do cd's anymore
Number of Piercings:	3
Number of Tattoos:	2
Number of things in my Past I Regret:	don't have regrets
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

All in all, not a totally wasted day .... but I still have to write! Toodles.

PS. Be Blessed!

Happy New Year

For This New Year:

I want all the best things in life to bumrush your life with such a fury that you have no doubt what exceptional living is all about. So this is the only toast I could find that was appropriate.

I wish a gang of SMILES come to terrorize your face.

I wish that PEACE breaks into your home,

And vandalize the place .... with LOVE,

May your clothes always reek of SUCCESS,

And may HAPPINESS

Slap you so hard across the face,

The only tears you’ll cry are tears of JOY.

In short ...

Let 2007 Be The Best Year of Your Freakin’ Life!!!

Gearing up for 2007 - Day Ten

So here we are. It's the last day and even though the last month of 2006 is almost at a close, I'm glad that we stuck with it. I have really enjoyed reading your responses and writing my own. They all put alot on my mind and for that I am grateful. No man is an island and I thank each of you for contributing to my growth as a human being. With that said, our final quesion:

What do I want my theme to be for 2007?

This was an easy one for me. I knew even before 2006 had come to an end what my theme for 2007 was going to be. 2007 is my breakthough and breakout year. God was doing some serious work on me in 2006, putting me in a position to do some very big things in 2007 and I can't wait. So I am breaking through and breaking out .....

Gearing Up For 2007 - Day Nine

Almost there, guys! It's day nine and it's going to be heartwarming to see some of the answers. Today's question:

For what I am grateful?

I am grateful for so many things: God's grace, family support, a challenging career, decent health, etc.



But there are four things that I am particularly grateful for; four incredible males in my life that are the motivating factor for everything that I do. I am head over heels in love with all of them and appreciate them for the wonderful human beings that they are. Nothing is quite as special when they are not around. And I am so proud to be their mother, his daughter, his lover and bestfriend.

Gearing up for 2007 - Day Eight

So we're rolling on to day eight - with the passing of Coretta Scott King this year, today's question seemed kind of fitting. Why? Well, her husband Martin Luther King, Jr. faced some seemingly insurmountable challenges and was able to successfully overcome most of them. So today, let's talk about:

What were my biggest challenges? How did I overcome them?

Gearing up for 2007 - Day Seven

So now we're at day 7. And this was one for the journal. I actually started thinking about it yesterday and still am a bit perplexed. I answered it but then the question seemed to beg for a response with a deeper meaning. So I scrapped the original answer and thought some more. Let's see how you do with this one.

What did I do right?

Gearing Up For 2007 - Day Six

I'm back with more questions that are designed to put us in the right mindset for the new year. We are relating, reflecting and releasing!

What were the fun things I did? The not-so-fun?

Gearing up for 2007 - Day Five

So we're halfway there and you guys are doing very well! A+ for your contributions.

What were the three most significant events of the last year?

MY CHRISTMAS WISH TO YOU

If I could wish a wish for you,
it would be for peace and happiness
not only now,
but for the whole year through!

I wish that there always be food on your table.
And that you always remember those less fortunate.
May you always take time to share,
and thank those who share with you.

I wish for time, so you may reflect
on the blessings that you have,
and that you express your love
to those who are dear to you.

May you never feel lonely,
because there are those who care.

That you realize:
you are special,
you are unique,
you make a difference,
not only at Christmas, but all year!

I wish for your thoughts to be positive ones,
that you never quit,
that you never give up,
and that you continue to learn.

I wish for the love, peace, and joy
of Christmas be yours always,

Gearing up for 2007 - Day Four

We're almost to the midway point of our reflection exercise. Thanks to all that participate. Today's question is a good one so here we go.

What did I complete or release?

Gearing up for 2007 - Day Three

We're rolling on with day three. And our question is: (DRUM ROLL PLEASE)

What would I have done differently? Why?

Gearing up for 2007 - Day Two

So, today is our day to brag. Don't hold back. I'm sure you'll be surprised like I was all that you were able to get done in 2005. Write it down, then give yourself a big hug! I'm proud of you!

What did I accomplish?

Countdown to a New Year

As January 1st looms in the not so distant future, many are already plotting and planning their new resolutions for 2007. We all want to create commanding goals that have the power to propel you past every obstacle so below are ten steps to make sure that you’ll be unstoppable.

1. Know Your Purpose -- Above all, for a goal to have motivating power, it must be meaningful to you. Write out a Purpose Statement for your goal. Know what’s in it for you. What will it contribute to your life? In addition to what you expect to gain from the outcome, think about how the pursuit itself will benefit you. What skills will your goal call on you to stretch or acquire?

2. Map Your Route -- It’s become a cliché because it’s true: Failing to plan is planning to fail. Know the mileposts between you and your goal and have a detailed plan for reaching the first one. As you near the first milepost, begin to develop details of your plan for reaching the next one. The lure of the next milepost will whet your eagerness to keep going and fire your enthusiasm for wrapping up the current one.

3. Keep Your Focus -- Be one-pointed in pursuing each step of your goal. Energy flowing in a focused channel can create a Grand Canyon. Without focus, it creates a swamp. Mentally review tomorrow’s steps before you fall asleep at night; repeat them as you start each day.

4. Create Momentum – Utilize Newton’s First Law: A body in motion tends to stay in motion. Get moving on your goal as soon and as often as you possibly can. Don’t wait until you think you have ‘enough’ information or time. Begin where you are, with what you have and what you know. The road will open to you as you go.

5. Ask Questions -- Ask yourself questions about your goal constantly. Ask if there’s a straighter path. Ask how else you can look at it or what else you need to do or know. Your mind will automatically produce or lead you to answers. Ask kids how they would approach the step you’re focused on, or people wholly outside your field. Explaining your question to them will help you understand better what you’re seeking, and their answers may trigger new ways to look at your situation.

6. Read Goal-Related Material Daily -- Capitalize on the fact that you live in the information age. Every day find at least one more nugget of data about your goal. Seek out the top-notch experts in your field, study what they say and do, and apply what you learn.

7. Have an Idea Catcher Handy -- Good ideas pop up suddenly and evaporate as quickly as they come. Be prepared to catch them. Record enough details to let yourself recapture the idea later. A single word or two that seems significant at the moment may look nonsensical later. Set aside time every day to transfer all the ideas you have collected into one central file. Not only will that keep good ideas from getting lost, but it will program your mind to continue producing and elaborating on them.

8. Talk It Up -- Ruthlessly guard your self-talk. Delete every doubt instantly. Choose to believe you can achieve your aim whether the way is apparent or not. Learn to craft affirmations and use them continuously. Mastering your mindset is the one essential to achieving your goal.

9. Ramp It Up -- Use the Power of Two to invigorate yourself. Stay at a task for 2 minutes longer. Add 2 more ideas to your file. Make 2 more contacts. Ask 2 more questions. Increase the quality of your focus by 2%. Do routine tasks 2% faster. Every day find something you can improve by a factor of 2. It’s just enough of a challenge to give you the winning edge.

10. Empower Your Goal with Gratitude – To keep your enthusiasm high, consciously practice gratitude for your goal, for the fact that you have it, for all it is doing to give purpose to your life, for the ways it is nourishing your personal growth, for all it is teaching you and allowing you to explore.

Gratitude empowers your vision and provides you with the humility you need to stay open. It adds passion to your will to achieve, keeps you operating from your heart and gives meaning to the smallest task. By all means, give thanks, and travel in its joy.

But let's also evaluate not only what we want to accomplish next year but what we have acheived this past year. It's a ten day countdown to the New Year and each day we will celebrate with a new question. I look forward to reading your response. See below our first question. All the best!

What did I learn in 2006?

For.Give.Ness

Yep, I had to come back and revisit the whole forgiveness subject.

I guess my challenge is that to some degree I'm a people pleaser. I'm sensitive to others feelings and want everyone to be ok with themselves and with me .... to a certain degree. There does come a point when all of the good vibrations fly right out the window. I don't ever wish anyone ill because I believe in Karma and don't any bad stuff to float back my way because of some pettiness. I don't like being mean judgemental or standoffish and it sometimes causes guilty feeelings to cut someone off, even when the person has done something worthy of extreme measures like banishment. I strive to forgive and forget BUT, that doesn't mean that I will allow you access to my emotions or trust ever again.

Thank God that the universe always gives all of the necessary tools just when you need them. I was waging a mighty war this morning against negative thoughts and feelings due to my being unforgiving and just when I felt I was being overcome, I saw the perfect reminder of what I was missing on a blog.

Just a note: Failure to learn a lesson the first time doesn't mean that God marches you to the back of the class and sits you there with a dunce cap on your head only to eventually forget about you. Failure to learn the lesson just means that you will repeat the class until you truly get it. Failure to "get it" also reminds us that painful experiences--in relationships, at work, in life--are not always an indication of our weakness, lack of intelligence or poor judgment. It just means God will continue to give us lessons designed for our growth, designed for our greatest good.

I'm in the front row taking notes. Consider this the cliff notes version on the Book of Forgiveness:

Forgiveness isn't condoning the behavior.
To forgive isn't saying, "what you did is okay." It's saying, "the consequences of your behavior belong to God, not to me." When you forgive, you transfer the person from your own system of justice to God's. To forgive is to recognize that the wrong done against you is a debt of sin, and all sin is against God. Therefore, in forgiving, you transfer the debt from your ledger of accounts to God's, leaving all recompense in his hands.

Forgiveness isn't forgetting what happened.
It would be foolish to erase from mind some of the wrongs done to you. If you did, you'd never learn from your experiences and would relive the same situations, and consequently, disappointments. What can eventually be forgotten are the raw emotions associated with the event. When you forgive, the terrible memories and feelings gradually diminish.

Forgiveness isn't restoring trust.
Trust is earned. To blindly trust someone who's hurt you is naïve and irresponsible. If a person's a thief, it's foolish to give him a key to your house. If he's a pedophile, you'd be derelict to hire him as a baby-sitter. As such, forgiving a wrong does not mean extending the person an invitation of sin again.

Forgiveness isn't synonymous with reconciliation.
It's a necessary step toward reconciliation, yet reconciliation isn't necessarily the goal of forgiveness. In fact, there are situations where reconciliation is not a good idea. If the other person's unwilling to reconcile due to bitterness or denial, you can still forgive. But it's silly, if not dangerous, to seek reconciliation when the other person is unrepentant, unchanging, or unwilling.

Forgiveness doesn't mean doing the other person a favor.
In Judaism, forgiveness isn't required unless repentance is demonstrated and pardon is sought. But Jesus raised the standard, commanding that you forgive even those who remain unrepentant.

Forgiveness isn't easy.
But if you desire to be faithful, you must follow in the footsteps of God, who has forgiven your great offenses. Hopefully by understanding what forgiveness is not, you'll be better able to honor this great command.

God Bless

Daddy's Little Girl

I am a big ole Daddy's Girl and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Always have been and always will be. He is my hero; larger than life to me and still what I want to be when I grow up. He was my first love and has set a very high standard for every man that has followed. He's a charmer always quick with a smile and even quicker with words of wisdom worthy of his 70 plus years.

That's not to say that I don't recognize his weaknesses as well. He is certainly not the emotional sort - his mother died when he was a little boy. He and his younger brother were raised by their father until he remarried when my father was in college. So Daddy is not familiar with the emotions of a women, they seem to baffle him more than most but that never stopped him from loving my mother, older sister and myself as hard and deep as anyone could imagine.

Daddy is large in size - standing close to 6'4 and tipping the scales at 230 but he he is larger in spirit. He provided well for his family, exposing us to as much as possible without spoiling us. He pushed his daughters hard but never failed to express the importance of enjoying our success. He ruled the house with unquestionable strength and unshakeable focus. He never seemed uncertain of anything. His belief in his family was unwavering and I treasure that most. We were his priority, his reason for doing all that he did. He taught us that character and upholding your word meant more than the amount of money you made or accolades that you garnered. He showed up how to live life without regrets by taking calculated risks throughout his. And he showed us what it really meant to be a husband and a father.

We ate dinner together every night, went on family vacations three times a year and spent quality time together more than most. Even with all of the good times and fond recollections, there are two memories that for me, make up my father.

My fondest memory is going to to my father's softball league games - the crack of the bat, the muffled sound of the ball hitting the glove, the laughter, cheers and good-natured bickering all set to the backdrop of the smell and sounds of the Budweiser Brewery are as vivid now as they were when I was ten. Best of all, it was usually just me and him and I basked in my father's love.

The second memory of my father comes much later, when I was in my early 20's. After the rape, I was gripped by depression and I honestly didn't think I would make it through. My mother would call me at home while she was at work and if I didn't answer - she would come immediately home. My father never seemed to doubt but at one particularly low point, when I was sitting on the floor in the basement crying hysterically - he stormed down the steps, pulled me to my feet, and wrapped his arms around me. "I am your rock," he told me. "Hold on to me. I will never let you fall." And he never did. Once again, it was just me and him but this time - it was his strength that I drew upon.

Those are the memories that dancing through my mind as I sit by my father's hospital bed. He had major surgery on Monday and this is only the second time in my life that I have seen him ill enough to be hospitalized for any length of time. And even as he sleeps, groggy from pain medication and dwarfed by the hospital bed - he is still larger than life. He is still my first love.

And I will always be Daddy's Little Girl.

God took the strength of a mountain,
The majesty of a tree,
The warmth of a summer sun,
The calm of a quiet sea,

The generous soul of nature,
The comforting arm of night,
The wisdom of the ages,
The power of the eagle’s flight,

The joy of a morning in spring,
The faith of a mustard seed,
The patience of eternity,
The depth of a family need,

Then God combined these qualities,
When there was nothing more to add,
He knew His masterpiece was complete,
And with that, He gave me my Dad.

Thanks for the support!

Whew! Y'all sure know how to overwhelm a sister! Thanks to all of those who came by the chat to support me and all of the other authors in the house. I appreciate it so much! Don't forget there is a full day of chats tommorrow so if you have time ... stop through and say hey!

Continued blessings!

Join Me At The Author Jamboree!

Author and Promotions Guru Donna Hill came up with a great idea: Invite a slew of authors from all genres, self-published and those with major houses, male and female and have them hanging out in a chatroom all day long for a week. Each author gets an hour long slot to talk about their books and field questions from readers and writers alike. It has been information and most of all a ton of fun! I've been privileged to chat with Lolita Files, LA Banks, Dee Savoy, Deatri Bey King, Shelia Goss, Michelle Monkou and many, many more.

Big Kudos to Donna Hill for pulling off such a big endeavor with her usual grace and style!

With that said, I invite you to drop by and join me as I will be chatting live about my novel, Easier Said Than Done, and upcoming projects among other things. Prizes will be given away and drinks have been known to be served.

My chat is TODAY at 3pm Central. That's 4 on the East Coast and 1 on the West.

I would love for you to stop by and show your support, simply go to Donna Hill Promotions; click on the right side bar link that reads: DH Promotions Chat Room, Also be sure to check out the remaining authors this week: Tarik Moore, Justin Thomas, Brandon Masse, Marlon Sanders, Michael Key, Kim Robinson, Candice Poarch, Angie Daniels, Alicia Rice, Deatri King Bey, Jonathan Luckett, Tanisha L Herrin, Dwayne S Jospeh, Larriane, Jade Alex, TL Gardner, Janis Susan May, Marti Tucker, Harold L Turley, Maureen Smith, Linda Hudson Smith, Mari Atherton, Sheila Lipsey, and Noire.

Look forward to seeing you there.

Thought for the day .......

"If your life is a campaign against things, the things you fight will expand."

If there is something in your life that you don't want?

If so, then stop worrying about it and stop talking about it. You may not realize it, but the energy you put into fighting the issue, keeps it alive. Whenever you agonize over something, you breathe life into it.

Happily, the reverse is also true. Withdraw your energy and focus and the issues shrinks, until it goes away. Its time to give yourself the relief you deserve.

Decide to truly let go of what you are fighting, emotionally, and watch as it evaporates and no longer robs your spirit.

Moving Beyond Appearances: Softening Judgment

It is our natural inclination to judge people, since it happens without our even thinking about it. We take one look and summarize a whole person-overweight, pretty, stylish, sloppy. This habit comes from the mind's need to categorize the world in order to be able to function without becoming overwhelmed. When we judge, we are looking for pertinent information, trying to determine whether the person approaching is a threat, an ally, or someone we don't need to worry about. This way of looking at people makes sense in a dangerous context, but in our daily lives it leads to an overly simplistic reading of the people we meet.

If you have ever judged someone dismissively, only to have them become a dear friend once you got to know them, you know the hazards of the judgment cycle firsthand. An experience like that may have led you to soften your natural tendency to believe your first impressions. We will always notice things about the people we meet, but as we become more conscious of the shortcomings of judgment, we won't be satisfied with our surface observations. We may notice that someone is driving an expensive car, but we will decide whether to befriend her based on getting to know her over time. We will not rule out a friendship with someone with messy hair, especially if he turns out to have a great sense of humor and a kind heart. Liking or disliking a person is a choice you will naturally make, but it will be after you have gotten to know them.

Case in point: I met a woman through an online group that I participate in. We'll call her Judy. Now, Judy told us right away that she worked as a stripper and even thought she didn't particularly like it - she had bills that needed to be paid. Immediately, another lady - we'll call her Trish - started voicing judgements about Judy based on what she did for a living and promptly dismissed her as unworthy of her friendship. It was unfortunate because if Trish had spent just five minutes listening to Judy - she would have seen what a beautiful person Judy is, honest, open and wanting to make a change. Judy was looking for direction, not judgement and Trish shortchanged herself out of an opportunity to help someone else.

So next time you notice yourself judging somebody, try to send love, light, or blessings to the person you were judging. Then try to listen to them openly or look them in the eye and learn something about them. If this is not easy for you, remember not to judge yourself either. Trust that with practice, you will successfully disable your habitual patterns. As you do, you will find a whole new dimension of perception opening up to you, allowing you to see beyond the surface and into the essence of the people you meet.

Free To Be Me

Today, I'm simply going to post a quote that I discovered earlier this morning by Muhammad Ali. It really speaks to the way I'm feeling on this blustery December morning in Chicago.

QUestion for ya: Why is it so challenging for others to be happy at someone's success because it's not their own? I'm so sick of others who are so limited in their vision that they hate to see others doing well. I'm extremely tired of those narrow minded people who only want to see you contained in a tiny box of their making. It infuriates me when someone wants you to mold to some cookie cutter shape that they've created.

I will not be contained.

I will not be held back and I will most certainly not bend to someone else's standards just so they can feel better in their own skin. It's the closest thing to insanity that I've ever experienced.

Today, I dare to fly like Maya Angelou and do it "my way" like Sammi Davis. I'm gonna float like a butterfly and sting like a bee just like Ali. So if you're not with the program then you bettah get out the way, 'cause you just may get hurt.

Tell 'em how you feel Your Greatness: "I know where I'm going and I know the truth, and I don't have to be what you want me to be. I'm free to be what I want."

Amen, my brotha. Amen.

Today is World Aid's Day!

SOME MIND-BLOWING FACTS AND QUOTES ABOUT THE GLOBAL AIDS EPIDEMIC:

You may or may not be aware that today is World AIDS Day. I know. . . we hear so much about the global AIDS epidemic that it's easy to get desensitized to it so I want to bring it home for you.

--In Africa, 6,600 PEOPLE DIE OF HIV/AIDS. . . EVERY DAY. Think about that. . . 3,000 people died in the terrorist attacks of September 11th, 2001. More than twice that many people will die in Africa today. . . and tomorrow. . . and the day after tomorrow, etc.

--Or put it this way. Every single day, more people die of HIV/AIDS in Africa than the total number of U.S. soldiers lost in the Iraq war. And every week, more people die of HIV/AIDS globally than the 58,000 U.S. soldiers lost in Vietnam. That's staggering.

--And that's just the fatalities. 15 million children worldwide have lost a parent to AIDS. Oftentimes, these orphans are left to fend for themselves. . . or older brothers and sisters have to raise their younger siblings.

But there is some good news:.

--Aggressive awareness and prevention campaigns have slowed the spread of HIV. Uganda is a great example. 21% of the adult population in Uganda was HIV positive in 1991. Today it's only 7%.

--Other countries that have reversed climbing AIDS rates include the Dominican Republic, Jamaica, Rwanda, Senegal, Thailand, and Zambia.

So what can YOU do? One of the coolest things you can do is sign up to sponsor a child affected by AIDS. But there are other ways to help too. World Vision has a fantastic website that lists 12 ways you can join the fight against AIDS. Take a minute to check it out."

Also, today, remind your coworkers that it's World AIDS Day. And when they give you a blank stare and ask why you interrupted their Fantasy Football discussion to talk about AIDS, tell them about the 6,600 people who are going to die in Africa today. . . and then tell them that for the same amount of money they're going to drop at Applebee's happy hour after work, they could sponsor an AIDS orphan for a whole month. Then, have them check out this photo montage that the "L.A. Times" did for World AIDS Day. . .

And if that doesn't thaw their calloused hearts, maybe share a few quotes on the subject. . .

--COLIN POWELL: "No war on the face of the Earth is more destructive than the AIDS pandemic. I was a soldier. But I know of no enemy in war more insidious or vicious than AIDS. . .

--"Will history record a fateful moment in our time, on our watch, when action came too late?"

--BONO: "What is happening to Africa mocks our pieties, doubts our concern, and questions our commitment to the whole concept of equality. . .

--"Because if we're honest, there's no way we could conclude that such mass death DAY AFTER DAY would ever be allowed to happen anywhere else."

--RICH STEARNS, president of WORLD VISION: "I believe that this could very well be looked back on as the sin of our generation. I look at my parents and ask, where were they during the civil rights movement?

--"I look at my grandparents and ask, what were they doing when the holocaust in Europe was occurring with regard to the Jews, and why didn't they speak up?

--"And when we think of our great, great, great-grandparents, we think how could they have sat by and allowed slavery to exist?

--"And I believe that our children and their children, 40 or 50 years from now, are going to ask, what did you do while 40 million children became orphans in Africa?"

--NIKKI WOODS, regular joe: "Now that you KNOW the problem, what are ya gonna do about it?"

NaNoWriMo Update

DRUM ROLL PLEASE!!!!!!

I did it! I successfully completed 50,000 words and am a winner in this year's NaNoWriMo competition.

It was a fabulous experience and taught me two valuable lessons about writing. 1.) I learned hot to focus more on just moving the story line along and writing without judging ever little thing as I go. 2.) I also learned how emotionally exhausting writing can be when done right. I put all of my heart, soul and PAIN into those 50 thousand words and have already been approached by a publisher. YEAH! You can still click on my page to read the excerpt that is currently posted: My NaNoWriMo Page

Congrats to enigma.ink, writerwritz and WashuSaotome who completed if not all, at least most of the word count. Also, many thanks going out to those who sent inspirational words and cyber pats on the back to keep me going. Can't forget my little cheerleaders - Tyler and Junior - who make everything worthwhile.

My Survival Kit has been depleted but my Sweetie has promised something special to help me celebrate my accomplishment. Definately going to hold him to it.

I am so damn proud of myself that I can't help but do the booty dance while yelling, "Margarita's on me!"

A Literary Legacy: 1940 -2006

Bebe Moore Campbell, a best-selling author who wrote with compassion and candor about social issues from the African American perspective, died Monday of complications from brain cancer. She was 56.

BeBe passed over while at her home in Los Angeles, surrounded by family and friends.

She is a literary giant and one of my favorite authors. Not only because she had mastered the art of words but moreso because in her novels, she took up such topics as racism and the problems of mental illness. Her closely observed details about characters engaged in complicated relationships led reviewers to compare her to such literary masters as Anton Chekhov and Edith Wharton.

Several of Campbell's novels are set in Los Angeles, including "Brothers and Sisters", which explores the strained aftermath of the city's 1992 riots. The novel's main character, a black woman banker, is torn between her commitment to a white co-worker and the black man she accuses of sexual harassment.

"This book is about succeeding and surviving, even being happy in a society where every card seems stacked against you," novelist Carolyn See wrote in a review for the Washington Post.

See called Campbell one of the most important African American novelists of the 20th century and regularly included "Brothers and Sisters" in a course she taught about writers of the American West.

Another of Campbell's novels set in Los Angeles, "What You Owe Me" (2001), is a saga of two women who launch a cosmetics empire and the struggles that follow.

The book is "a meticulously reinvented landscape of 1940s Los Angeles," noted a Times review in naming Campbell's novel one of the best books of 2001.

"Bebe was a passionate voice for Los Angeles," novelist Paula L. Woods said Monday. "She wrote about the historical and social forces that make us rub against each other and spark. Her heart was in the African American community.

"There will be a gap without her. Already, you feel that absence."

As a novelist Campbell was attracted to strong female characters, caught up in a life-changing drama.

In "72 Hour Hold" (2005), a woman struggles with family members and the healthcare system when her grown daughter becomes mentally ill.

Campbell also wrote about mental illness in an unusual children's novel, "Sometimes My Mommy Gets Angry" (2002), about a little girl whose mother is unbalanced and erratic.

"It was courageous of Bebe," to write the book, said James Fugate, co-owner of Eso Won bookstore in Los Angeles, where Campbell regularly attracted "out-the-door" crowds when introducing her newest novel.

"The book is a way of expressing to children what they need to know, " Fugate said. The little girl in the story learns to call a grandmother or an aunt for help if her mother is not well.

Campbell was open about the fact that there was mental illness in her family but was not specific about the details.

"Bebe put her compassion and sensitivity into the writing," Woods said.

Campbell's first book, "Successful Women, Angry Men: Backlash in the Two Career Marriage" (1986), was nonfiction.

She also wrote a memoir, "Sweet Summer, Growing Up With and Without My Dad" (1989), about her young life as the daughter of divorced parents. She would spend the school year with her mother in Philadelphia and summer with her father, a paraplegic, in North Carolina.

Her journalistic articles appeared in the Los Angeles Times, the New York Times, Ebony magazine and elsewhere.

Along with her best-selling author's status, she received an Image Award for Literature from the NAACP for her 1992 novel "Your Blues Ain't Like Mine" about the segregated Deep South.

Born Elizabeth Bebe Moore in Philadelphia, she received a bachelor's degree in elementary education from the University of Pittsburgh before she began a career as a schoolteacher.

She married Tiko Campbell. The couple settled in Washington, D.C., and had a daughter, Maia Campbell, before the marriage ended in divorce.

Campbell later married Ellis Gordon Jr., and they settled in Los Angeles. They had one son, Ellis Gordon III.

In addition to her husband and two children, she is survived by her mother, Doris Moore, and two grandchildren.

Funeral services are pending.

Contributions in her name can be made to the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill at NAMI Urban Los Angeles, 4305 Degnan Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90008; or to the United Negro College Fund, 8260 Willow Oaks Corporate Park Drive, P.O. Box 10444, Fairfax, VA 22031.

Fighting for my life

Don't ask my how I'm doing today because I may tell you I'm in the fight for my life.

In fact, this morning I was thumbing through the bible to find scriptures on faith in order to do some serious meditating. You don’t have to look far. Jesus said that in the world you will have temptations, tests, trials and tribulation. But He went on to say, “be of good cheer because I have overcome the world”. The good news: Jesus has defeated satan and hell for us, and He hands victory to us on a plate. We only have to receive by faith what the Lord has done. The Word says to fight the good fight of faith.

I also re-read my favorite quotes on faith: “Great faith is the product of great fights.” “Great testimonies are the outcome of great tests.” “Great triumphs can only come out of great trials.” One of my pastor friends always says, “if you don’t have a test you can’t have a testimony.”

A good fight is one you win - and that is why when you fight-the-fight by faith, you win. Faith is the victory that overcomes the world. Jesus used His faith, the faith of God, to defeat and overcome the tricks and temptations of the devil.

He now says we can do the same, and hands us His faith which is tried and tested with which to win and overcome. Satan the thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy, but Jesus has come that you might have life and life more abundantly.

Yes, you will go through things on this planet during the course of your life. You will face many unpleasant and sometimes tragic circumstances and events.

While this has been a year of abundant joy for me, and overwhelming blessings, it has been filled with trials and tribulations. In fact, before I started looking through the bible this morning – as I stated earlier, I would have said I was in a fight for my life. But then I remembered Jesus is there and He has given me faith to overcome and come through such situations.

By applying faith any circumstance, you will come through the time of testing and trial with a testimony to the glory of God.

One of my favorite songs is by Donnie McClurkin, “Stand”. The lyrics are so powerful from the very first verse when he asks the questions: What do you do when you've done all you can. And it seems like it's never enough? And what do you say when your friends turn away, you're all alone? Tell me, what do you give When you've given your all, and seems like you can't make it through? The answer is even more powerful: Child you just stand. You just stand. Stand. Don't you give up. Through the storm , through the rain, through the hurt, through the pain, don't you bow, don't bend, don't give up , don't give in. Hold on, just be strong. God will step in and it won't be long.

It may not be immediate and even though I know through faith that everything will work out for my good – doesn’t mean that the pain will go away. Doubt will creep in and peace may be fleeting, but that’s why the test is there in the first place. Trials are excersise for our faith.

And God is working it out.

Love .... true and unconditional

It's something that we all want and few of us ever get. Love in it's purest and most honest form. Typically called True Love or Unconditional Love it means giving of love without the expectation of receiving anything in return.

How many of us do that?

Many these days love with conditions. They will love you IF this or IF that. If you don't fit into these conditions then they no longer love you.

This is not true love.

The good news is that the power of love is held within each of us every moment. This wondrous energy is available merely by our use and conscious recognition. When we choose to love one another we transcend the lower personality perceptions and rise to a higher truth. We recognize our oneness, wholeness and interconnectedness.

This is not a conditional love or the type of love one may try to use to earn favors or expect validation, rather this is a universal and unconditional love that recognizes the beauty in life every moment. It is of a higher nature. It is a natural expression that does not expect an outcome. It is giving just for the sake of giving.

It is in the sharing and giving of love to others that we receive the same that we give. Give love and surely you will experience love itself. Express love to the world around you and the world will reflect back to you the power of love.

Each of us desires to understand and realize this experience of love. Just listen to the lyrics of music and you will quickly see how much the notion of love plays a part in our personal journey of life. We seek it in our families, relationships, careers, religions, hobbies, and even at times we look to nature itself. All the while, it is right within us ready to be given out and experienced.

Love is such a powerful force especially when shared. Biblically, it is explained this way:

"But the LORD said to Samuel, '...The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.'"
I Samuel 16:7b (NIV)

The Lord isn't even concerned with what we have, or what our profession is or how we look - what we're able to do or not do. God looks at our heart and sees the goodness that lies within.

Another thing I've learned about love is that it is also a devotion and action, not just an emotion. Love is not exclusively based on how we feel. Certainly our emotions are involved, but they cannot be our only criteria for love. True devotion will always lead to action - the action of true love.

Random things that I have learned about True Love:

True love takes much patience and understanding.

True love requires forgiveness and giving.

True love means you don't tire of the person or do anything that will hurt the person intentionally.

True love requires that you do the giving.

If all these things are done properly, true love will actually be returned to you. These days things are so fast paced and everyone is expecting all the time, this I feel is leading to a breakdown in the number of people who really understand what true love is. From what I've observed in other relationships and in my own; people just do not get it. True love is not what you can get, or what someone can give you or do for you. True love is the pleasure of doing for others. It is loving someone just for who they are and not for what they can do for you. And I am not simply referring to romantic relationships but friends, relatives and even strangers. I think it is the most challenging though in a romantic relationship.

Love ... true and unconditional is the best gift we can give to someone else. It is also the best gift we can give to ourselves.

Random Acts Of Kindness

Now that many are getting ready for the holiday season I thought this would be a good time to take a moment and send out some positive energy by simply appreciating the little acts of kindness that often go unnoticed.

For example: Did you notice the kind act someone did for you today?

Did you take a moment to appreciate that kind act?

You may have to search for that kind act - but it's there - it may have been something simple - like a cup of coffee being handed to you, or a friend saying something nice.

We all need to be appreciated.

When we do something for somebody, or say something kind to somebody and they respond with appreciation - it sure makes you feel good. In many cases you want to do it again.

But how often have you done something for someone and got no appreciation in return?

When that you have you probably don't feel very good and you may even avoid that person in the future.

We all love being appreciated.

So today take a moment to appreciate somebody - you'll make them feel good and you'll feel even better.

You'll then start this infectious cycle - where the more people you appreciate - the more appreciation goes around and the better everybody feels.

If somebody doesn't respond kindly - move on. Ignore them - it's their loss - they're not going to enjoy all that positive energy that you and everyone you appreciate is spreading.

Appreciate your fiancee, wife, kids, family members, friends,colleagues, bosses, even the person at the coffee shop that serves you your morning coffee. A little act of kindness goes a long.

When you appreciate others, you send out a tremendous amount of positive energy that comes back to you tenfold. Don't believe me? Try it for the next few days - and see how things go.

Don't get upset if you don't get a positive response - remember - it's their loss.

When you appreciate people - your subconscious mind picks up on this positive energy and attracts more positive people and situations into your life. Your subconscious mind says - Hey you're appreciating people, you're being positive - let's get you some more of this good stuff. That's when things really start to change.

Earlier this morning I went into a coffee shop (amidst the rush of holiday shoppers) and as I was walking in I saw a woman standing outside with a rather unpleasant look. Both her hands were full with shopping bags and it was clear that she couldn't open the door. So I kindly opened the door for her. She couldn't thank me enough.

I told her there was no need to thank me - I was merely doing what anybody else would do. That's when she surprised me. She said: "I've been trying to get in for the past 5 minutes and nobody could be bothered to hold the door open. I can't open it - I wish I could. But I was about to give up until you came along."

Wow!

Everyone was so focused on getting to the sales that nobody would hold the door open for her.

She was clearly happy that I held the door open for her and because she was so happy I even offered to carry her bags inside and get her a table while she ordered her coffee.

Would you have done the same? I sure hope so.

We all need little acts of kindness. We all benefit from these little acts of kindness.

This holiday season you may be in a rush to get somewhere - but take a moment to open the door for someone or express a little act of kindness.

You'll make someone feel a lot better and you'll feel better in return.

Sometimes we get too consumed with our own thoughts we ignore the little positive acts that go unappreciated.

Take time to appreciate those around you - you'll brighten their day, feel a lot better and attract more positive situations.

Continue to be blessed!

Be Blessed and Be Thankful

Thanksgiving, 1864, was proclaimed by President Abraham Lincoln in these words:

"It has pleased Almighty God to prolong our national life another year...to favor as well our citizens in their homes as our soldiers in their camps, and our sailors on the rivers and seas, with unusual health.
"He has largely augmented our free population by emancipation and by immigration, while He has opened to us new sources of wealth, and has crowned the labor of our working men in every department of industry with abundant rewards.
"Moreover, He has been pleased to animate and inspire our minds and hearts with fortitude, courage and resolution sufficient for the great trial ... into which we have been brought by cause of freedom and humanity ...
"Now, therefore, I .... do hereby appoint and set apart the last Thursday in November next as a day which I desire to be observed by all my fellow-citizens, wherever they may be then, as a day of thanksgiving and praise to Almighty God, the beneficent Creator and Ruler of the universe.
"And I do further recommend to my fellow-citizens aforesaid, that on that occasion they do reverently humble themselves in the dust, and from thence offer up penitent and fervent prayers and supplications to the great Disposer of events for a return of the inestimable blessings of peace, union and harmony throughout the land which it has pleased Him to assign as a dwelling-place for ourselves and for our posterity throughout all generations."

Bible Verse

Psalm 118 V 27 - 29: The Lord is God, and He has made His light to shine upon us. With boughs in hand join in the festal procession up to the horns of the altar. You are my God, and I will give You thanks: You are my God, and I will exalt You. Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever.

Prayer

O Lord, my God You are my Father and I will praise You forever. Father, help me to remember that Your grace is sufficient for this day. Help me to always remember that You have a plan for my life if only I will humbly come to You seeking guidance and direction. Father, I give You thanks for the many blessings You have allowed me. I thank You for family and for friends. I thank You for the necessities of life, and for strength to do Your will. Lord, help me to live my life as a constant thanksgiving to You. In the name of Jesus I ask that Your will be done in my life today.

Amen.

Asking For What You Want

I am going to stay with the "change your mind, change your life" theme for one more day because I really want people to get it. Most people don't always fully realize that we all have within us the ability to cocreate our lives with the universe. (note: when I say universe, I mean God but for those that may not believe in God - universe implies a greater being.) So many of us are taught to accept what we are given and not even to dream of anything more. But our hopes and dreams are the universe whispering to us, planting an idea of what's possible while directing us toward the best use of our gifts. The universe truly wants to give us our hearts' desires, but we need to be clear about what they are and ask for them.

To ask for something does not mean to beg or plead from a place of lack or unworthiness. It's like placing an order-we don't need to beg the salesperson for what we want or prove to them that we deserve to have it. It is their job to give us what we ask for; we only have to tell them what we want. Once we have a clear vision of what we desire, we simply step into the silent realm where all possibilities exist and let our desires be known. Whatever methods we use to become still, it is important that we find the quiet space between our thoughts.

From that still and quiet place, we can announce our intentions to the pure energy of creation. By imagining all the details from every angle, including scent, color, and how it would feel to have it, we design our dreams to our specifications. Similar to dropping a pebble into a pond, the ripples created by our thoughts travel quickly from this place of stillness, echoing out into the world to align and orchestrate all the necessary details to bring our desires into manifestation. Before leaving this wonderful space to come back to the world, release any attachment to the outcome and express gratitude. By doing this daily, we focus our thoughts and our energy while regularly mingling with the essence that makes it possible to build the life of our dreams.

Also, have a wonderful Thanksgiving Holiday. I am going to be taking an extended internet break to focus my energy on a few of my other projects. As Always, Be Blessed.

Outlining Your Intentions

I wanted to continue with the "change our mind, change our life" theme today. If you are ready to change your thoughts, one way to start is to make a list of the things you want.

The universe is aware of both the concrete goals we actively pursue and the nebulous dreams we have not yet begun to refine. Neither our struggles nor the daydreams that inspire us are beyond the range of universal perception. Yet to manifest our aspirations, we not only need to know what it is we generally wish to achieve; we also need to clearly articulate these aims to ourselves and the universe. When we create a list of what we want, citing each item in as much detail as possible, our aspirations take on new substance. What was once a mere wish becomes real and achievable when put into words. As you pour the contents of your heart and soul into your list, your well-defined ambitions become a part of you, and the universe responds to your new determination by placing opportunities related to your objectives in your path.

Whatever the nature of your desires, your list can help you channel your intellectual and emotional power into your efforts to realize them. The list you create should not simply be a record of your individual goals. Rather, it should be a comprehensive, exhaustive catalog of each target you want to reach and your reasons for aiming for them. This may mean that your list will encompass many pages of text, since when you write down and review your ambitions, you empower yourself to more accurately direct your goal-realization efforts. You then also have a framework in place that helps you distinguish success from setbacks. If you keep your list in a convenient spot and review it daily, you will inadvertently reaffirm your conviction to your aspirations, demonstrating to the universe that you are truly devoted to your chosen path while keeping your objectives fresh in your mind. If you have an altar, this would be a great place to keep your list.

As you compose your list, try not to edit or judge what you have written. Some of what you want may seem outlandish when considered in the context of your current circumstances. Whether you are destined to fulfill the items on the unique long-term agenda you create in a year, 10 years, or 20 years, if you are free with your ideas and understand that you may not bring these dreams into the realm of reality for some time, your list will attract the universe's benevolence even as it energizes and inspires you.

Blessings.

Affirmations: Just for you Bianca

As promised, I want to post some information on affirmations. I've used affirmations for close to nine years now and have stacks of worn journals where I note and change whatever affirmations I am working on depending on where I am in life. I first learned about them in a book called, "Change Your Mind, Change Your Life" in which using affirmations was briefly introduced. I was hooked.

The idea behind affirmations is fairly simple. Most of use grow up learning to put ourselves down for any real or imagined reason. We grow up beleiving certain things about ourselves or comparing ourselves negatively to others. The use of positive affirmations is a technique to change that negative self-talk into something more positive.

Since we've spent many years on the negative image it is unreasonable to expect an instant effect from affirmations, but if you stick to it for a few days, with honesty, trust, and belief, then results will start to happen.

You will also learn to be more aware of your thought pattern and will be able to more quickly stop negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones.

Affirmations can be tailored to affect change in any part of your life: health, love, finances, etc.

Here are a few general ones that I use to start my day:

* Positive thoughts bring me the benefits I desire
* Negative thoughts have no influence over me
* Everyday and in everyway I am getting better and better

I have also found that the more specific the affirmation, the more powerful. I also have affirmations that concern loved ones so that I can conciously send them positive energy.

As always .... BE BLESSED!

The Gospel Of Prosperity

Hip-hop soul legend Mary J. Blige has always let it be known that God was an important part of her life and upbringing. From vignettes on her album to her oft-present cross, the born-again Christian insists that God wants her to have nice things. In a recent 'Blender' magazine article, the sometimes downtrodden diva stated:

"My God is a God who wants me to have things. He wants me to bling. He wants me to be the hottest thing on the block. I don't know what kind of God the rest of y'all are serving, but the God I serve says, 'Mary, you need to be the hottest thing this year, and I'm gonna make sure you're doing that.'"

Could Mary J. be a proponent of what many term ''The Gospel of Prosperity?"

Read the rest of the article!

If you're broke does that mean you're not a good Christian? Take the poll on my WGCI Personality page!

Happy Sunday!

Random Thoughts on a Crisp Saturday Morning

Why is it just now hitting me how close we are to Thanksgiving? The menu has been set but why in the world haven't I even thought about a grocery list? Do we get way to caught up in the ceremony of certain holidays and fail to remember or reflect on the meaning behind them?

Speaking of holidays, why are the stores already implementing their evil marketing strategies to make us spend more money on presents than we really need to? Both of my babies are already making lists and they are only 5 and 3. It is INSANE. I never realized how brainwashed we get around the holidays by zealous ad agencies until I had children.

Just one more holiday thought, "is it really the thought that counts"? We try to do a grab bag at work so that we are not spending too much money on co-workers when rightfully that money can be spent somewhere else. Good idea right? I thought so too. So why did they announce that the minimum would be 500 dollars????? I thought I was going to pass out. Now, I know I work with ballers that can probably afford it - I can't speak for all - but I sure in the hell am not going to spend 500 plus dollars on someone I probably don't like anyway. I mean, we just work together, right? We have lost the whole meaning of behind the holidays.

Is it just me or is OJ Simpson just plain crazy? Now, I know he has a book to promote so it makes sense that he has started to make the television rounds but who in their right "innocent" mind would say, "I didn't kill my ex-wife, BUT if I did, here's how I would do it." C-R-A-Z-Y.

Along the lines of murder, does anyone else kill their children's pet fish at such a rapid pace as I do? We didn't even name this one. Poor anonymous fish, you sure hung in there. You just had no idea that you were being adopted by the mommy dearest of fish. Back to the pet store. We'll try it again.

Have you ever taken a moment to stop and listen to the thoughts that run through your head at any given moment? I really think that we can be harder on our self than anyone else. I had this conversation with my cousin the other day. It's the reason I love affirmations. They are a great way to counteract some of the negative thoughts that stomp freely in our brains. I just may do a post on affirmations later today.

Is it me or does Starbucks have the best racket going? I'm twitching right now; anxious for a fix. And to think that the prices just went up. Magic Johnson has become the ghetto JOE dealer bring all that liquid crack to impoverished areas. Some mornings I just wish they would attach an IV and give me a Carmel Machiatto drip.

This just popped into my head as I'm watching a LifeTime television movie, entitled "A Woman's Betrayal." Why is it that women can't just wish other well and be done with it? Once again, I have a friend dealing with the backstabbing of her so called "girl". She looks to me for sympathy and I do feel for her but in my mind I'm saying, "here we go again." She really should have seen this one coming. It's the second time with the same friend. It's gotten sickening to see how low women will stoop to try to get what they want. And to make it even worse, usually it's over some man that doesn't even want them. Hell, I should have made this thought number one. Because honestly with the majority of women, it's always DRAMA, which is why I limit my female friends to a very small number. Don't get me wrong, I love the bonding that can occur between women when all parties are mature, honest and sincerely want the best for each other ... it can be very powerful on a personal and professional level. I have some phenomenal female friends and mentors. It just doesn't happen very often which is why I keep the onese I have very close to me. They are truly precious and hard to find. And JMO, I don't need male friends. It is very hard for men and women to be just friends. Especially if you're in a relationship. What's the point? If your man is worth anything, he is all the friend you'll ever need. Again .... JMO.

There is almost nothing better than a good book and a thick, freshly washed comforter on a quiet Saturday morning ... before the kids get up and the rest of the world starts moving .... it's like spending quality time with a good friend.

The only thing better than that is being in love.

Happy Saturday.

My Gratitude List

It was a rough day for me yesterday. I accepted it without embracing it and know that today is a new beginning. So to do a little mental check and balance, I am stealing this idea from a fellow blogger, who shares his gratitude list each Wednesday on his blog Lover's Anonymous.

I never fail to count my blessings but there is something very powerful about putting them in writing and sharing them with the world. I tried to just bullet point my list but that was impossible for me. I had to include explanations. I also tried to limit it to five. Also impossible.

My 40 minute drive into work. It is peaceful, quiet and allows me to pray and clear my head before I get to the j.o.b.

The first sip of coffee. Whew, at 4:00 in the am there is nothing better .... well, almost nothing, but that's another gratitude list. :)

Kissing the sweet part of my three year old's neck when he first wakes up. He still smells like a baby and only likes to cuddle when he's sleepy so I take advantage of Saturday and Sunday mornings. He crawls in my bed and we cuddle while watching the Disney Channel.

Whispered late night conversations with the one I love. That is the time when hopes, dreams and wants run rampant. It's by far the sweetest and most calming part of my day.

My five-year old's zest for learning. We have the best conversations. Yesterday we saw a group of teenagers smoking and for 15 minutes we went back and forth about the dangers of smoking and why he would never do it. Finally, he asked me where they bought the cigarettes from. When I replied, "the store." He said, "but mommy, why would a store sell something that would hurt you?" Good question, huh?

My mother's daily meditations. Ain't nothing like a praying mama.

My friend, Melissa and her drive-by visits that keep my sane. I never know when she's going to show up but she's always right on time.

My assistant's anal retentive nature. My life would slowly fall apart without her. :)

Asisago Cheese Bagles from The Corner Bakery. Especially when they are just a little burnt. Yummy.

My big sister (she hates it when I call her that), who gives me time to myself when I need it but stalks me when I stay away too long.

Fall colors. Especially the leaves, the reds and the oranges, look beautiful covering a freshly cut lawn.

Friends that continue to peel away my layers. It takes a while to work your way into my circle, but when you are .... there's no "get out of jail free" card. You're stuck with me for life.

My Christmas Cactus that never fails to flower around this time. It is from a clippling of the Christmas cactus that was placed on my grandfather's grave some 24 years ago. It's beautiful.

My father's sense of timing. I'm never late for anything.

The ability to express myself through the written word. It is truly a stress reliever.

Share your gratitude list.

Dare To Dance Outside The Lines

Just a short post today. A lot of things have been happening in my life that seem to have no rhyme or reason. Of course, I know that's not true but at times doubt can creep in if I am not careful to guard my thoughts.

Last night I was thinking about my tendency to conform in my personal life. Have you ever considered just giving yourself permission to break the rules, to move outside the boundaries of looking at things. Just for a moment, forget about practical, realistic ideas. Dare to go beyond the self-censorship that comes from worrying what people think.

We can all probably think of times where we really wanted to stretch our wings, whether it be personally or professionally. I know I can. In relationships, especially - I tend to do what everyone expects.

I'm not sure why, maybe because I take so many risks in other areas of my life or maybe because I grew up watching my parents who seemed to have the perfect relationship, where there was no drama, nothing out of the ordinary just a lot of love. Whatever the reason, it has caused me to be in some situations that I probably should have looked twice at before getting involved. And I'm not just talking about romantic relationships but friendships as well. Often times, we give someone in our life too much power and keep them around much longer than they should be. Or we stay in a job that is no longer benefiting us as it once was.

Now I am not saying that we should simply dismiss how our actions and decisions affect other people in our lives, but I am suggesting that taking a long look at whether or not we are shortchanging ourselves in order to please others might be in order.

This morning, I have decided that I am cleaning house. Period. I often err on the side of being "too nice" and not being selfish enough to take care of me when I need to be taken care of. This has been a glaring problem this past year. As a result, my energy has been drained and my focus blurred on what I really want for my life.

I am ridding myself of negativity whether it be a person or a responsibility that I have taken on to make someone else happy. I am making a conscious choice to reduce my circle to exclude those with ulterior motives, those who seek only to take and not give, and those who are content to keep things status quo in their own lives.

Because when you follow your heart and dismiss unimportant "shoulds," you open the door to creative, spiritual and personal breakthroughs.

Today, I choose to dance outside the lines.

Wait...My Child

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried.
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child, you must wait!"

"Wait?, you say, wait!" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is Your hand shortened? Or have You not heard?
By faith I have asked, and am claiming Your Word."

"My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and You tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes,' a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign."

"And Lord, You promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, as we shall receive.
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply!"

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait."
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting...for what?"

He seemed then to kneel and His eyes wept with mine,
And He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want...but, you wouldn't know Me."

"You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there;
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence were all you could see."

"You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save ... (for a start),
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart."

The flow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have last."

"You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for thee.'
Your dreams for your loved ones overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss! if I lost what I'm doing in you!"

"So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me
And though oft may My answers seem terribly late,
My wisest of answers is still but to wait"

Moving In Real Time vs. Pushing The Fast-Forward Button

I've talked before about living in a "Fast Food Society." In this day and age we want what we want and we want it now! Gone are the days where we patiently save 50 dollars a month until we're able to buy a new car or go on a family vacation. Now all we have to do is open up a new credit card and instantly we can have all that our heart desires. Ofter we deal with challenges and problems in our lives in the same fashion.

We all go through times when we just want the pain over. In fact, if we could press a fast-forward button and propel ourselves into the future and out of our current circumstances, we probably would. Whether the situation we are facing is minor, or major such as the loss of a loved one, it is human nature to want to move away from pain and find comfort as soon as possible. Yet we all know deep down that we need to work through these experiences in a conscious fashion rather than bury our heads in the sand, because these are the times when we access important information about ourselves and life. The learning process may not be easy, but it is full of lessons that bring us wisdom we would not be able to find any other way.

The desire to press fast-forward can lead to escapism and denial, both of which only prolong our difficulties and in some cases make them worse. The more direct, clear, and courageous we are in the face of whatever we are dealing with, the more quickly we will move through the situation. Understanding this, we may begin to realize that trying to find the fast-forward button is really more akin to pressing pause. When we truly grasp that the only way out of any situation in which we find ourselves is to go through it, we stop looking for ways to escape and we start paying close attention to what is happening. We realize that we are exactly where we need to be. We remember that we are in this situation in order to learn something we need to know, and we can alleviate some of our pain with the awareness that there is a purpose to our suffering.

When you feel the urge to press the fast-forward button, remember that you are not alone; we all instinctively avoid pain. But in doing so, we often prolong our pain and delay important learning. As you choose to move forward in real time, know that in the long run, this is the least painful way to go.

NaNoWriMo Update

Just wanted to stop by and give you a brief update on my progress with NaNoWriMo. You can always click on my page to check my progress and read the excerpt that is currently posted: My NaNoWriMo Page

All in all I think it is going well. My word count is where it is supposed to be for the second week. The goal is not to have a polished manuscript so I am focusing more on just moving the story line along. Normally, I like to edit as I go - starting with the skeleton of the story and adding the meat as the story becomes more a part of me - but I am trying very hard not to get caught up in the perfection trap because it can seriously slow down word production.

Also, the story I am writing is an extremely emotional one. Considering where my life is right now, that could be a double edged sword. I certainly have the emotions to pull from but at times, it does become a bit much to endure as I tend to get overly attached to my characters. But I continue to plow through it, knowing that I will only be stronger because of it.

I have terrific writing buddies: enigma.ink, writerwritz, TeeCRoyal and WashuSaotome. I have an even more fantastic support team. So all of the tools are in place. Even my little cheerleaders - Tyler and Junior - have been very cooperative in letting mommy work.

My Survival Kit has been replenished- with the exception of the strong pair of hands; those are irreplacable. I did switch from Vanilla Candles to a more flowery scent. The Vanilla was making my sleepy.

And the offer for Margarita's upon completion of NaNoWriMo still stands!

Now there's nothing left to do but write, write, write!

12 Things The Negro Must Do For Himself

by Nannie Helen Burroughs (Circa Early 1900's)


1. The Negro Must Learn To Put First Things First. The First Things Are: Education; Development of Character Traits; A Trade and Home Ownership. The Negro puts too much of his earning in clothes, in food, in show and in having what he calls "a good time." The Dr. Kelly Miller said, "The Negro buys what he WANTS and begs for what he needs."

2. The Negro Must Stop Expecting God and White Folk To Do For Him What He Can Do For Himself. It is the "Divine Plan" that the strong shall help the weak, but even God does not do for man what man can do for himself. The Negro will have to do exactly what Jesus told the man (in John 5:8) to do--Carry his own load--"Take up your bed and walk."

3. The Negro Must Keep Himself, His Children And His Home Clean And Make The Surroundings In Which He Lives Comfortable and Attractive. He must learn to "run his community up"--not down. We can segregate by law, we integrate only by living. Civilization is not a matter of race, it is a matter of standards. Believe it or not--some day, some race is going to outdo the Anglo-Saxon, completely. It can be the Negro race, if the Negro gets sense enough. Civilization goes up and down that way.

4. The Negro Must Learn To Dress More Appropriately For Work And For Leisure. Knowing what to wear--how to wear it--when to wear it and where to wear it, are earmarks of common sense, culture and also an index to character.

5. The Negro Must Make His Religion An Everyday Practice And Not Just A Sunday-Go-To-Meeting Emotional Affair.

6. The Negro Must Highly Resolve To Wipe Out Mass Ignorance. The leaders of the race must teach and inspire the masses to become eager and determined to improve mentally, morally and spiritually, and to meet the basic requirements of good citizenship. We should initiate an intensive literacy campaign in America, as well as in Africa. Ignorance-- satisfied ignorance --is a millstone about the neck of the race. It is democracy's greatest burden. Social integration is a relationship attained as a result of the cultivation of kindred social ideals, interests and standards. It is a blending process that requires time, understanding and kindred purposes to achieve. Likes alone and not laws can do it.


7. The Negro Must Stop Charging His Failures Up To His "Color" And To White People's Attitude. The truth of the matter is that good service and conduct will make senseless race prejudice fade like mist before the rising sun. God never intended that a man's color shall be anything other than a badge of distinction. It is high time that all races were learning that fact. The Negro must first QUALIFY for whatever position he wants. Purpose, initiative, ingenuity and industry are the keys that all men use to get what they want. The Negro will have to do the same. He must make himself a workman who is too skilled not to be wanted, and too DEPENDABLE not to be on the job, according to promise or plan. He will never become a vital factor in industry until he learns to put into his work the vitalizing force of initiative, skill and dependability. He has gone "RIGHTS" mad and "DUTY" dumb.

8. The Negro Must Overcome His Bad Job Habits. He must make a brand new reputation for himself in the world of labor. His bad job habits are absenteeism, funerals to attend, or a little business to look after. The Negro runs an off and on business. He also has a bad reputation for conduct on the job--such as petty quarrelling with other help, incessant loud talking about nothing; loafing, carelessness, due to lack of job pride; insolence, gum chewing and--too often--liquor drinking. Just plain bad job habits!

9. He Must Improve His Conduct In Public Places. Taken as a whole, he is entirely too loud and too ill-mannered. There is much talk about wiping out racial segregation and also much talk about achieving integration. Segregation is a physical arrangement by which people are separated in various services. It is definitely up to the Negro to wipe out the apparent justification or excuse for segregation. The only effective way to do it is to clean up and keep clean. By practice, cleanliness will become a habit and habit becomes character.

10. The Negro Must Learn How To Operate Business For People--Not For Negro People, Only. To do business, he will have to remove all typical "earmarks," business principles; measure up to accepted standards and meet stimulating competition, graciously--in fact, he must learn to welcome competition.

11. The Average So-Called Educated Negro Will Have To Come Down Out Of The Air. He Is Too Inflated Over Nothing. He Needs An Experience Similar To The One That Ezekiel Had--(Ezekiel 3:14-19). And he must do what Ezekial did. Otherwise, through indifference, as to the plight of the masses, the Negro, who thinks that he has escaped, will lose his own soul. It will do all leaders good to read Hebrew 13:3, and the first Thirty-seven Chapters of Ezekiel. A race transformation itself through its own leaders and its sensible "common people." A race rises on its own wings, or is held down by its own weight. True leaders are never "things apart from the people." They are the masses. They simply got to the front ahead of them. Their only business at the front is to inspire to masses by hard work and noble example and challenge them to "Come on!" Dante stated a fact when he said, "Show the people the light and they will find the way!" There must arise within the Negro race a leadership that is not out hunting bargains for itself. A noble example is found in the men and women of the Negro race, who, in the early days, laid down their lives for the people. Their invaluable contributions have not been appraised by the "latter-day leaders." In many cases, their names would never be recorded, among the unsung heroes of the world, but for the fact that white friends have written them there. "Lord, God of Hosts, Be with us yet." The Negro of today does not realize that, but, for these exhibits A's, that certainly show the innate possibilities of members of their own race, white people would not have been moved to make such princely investments in lives and money, as they have made, for the establishment of schools and for the on-going of the race.

12. The Negro Must Stop Forgetting His Friends. "Remember." Read Deuteronomy 24:18. Deuteronomy rings the big bell of gratitude. Why? Because an ingrate is an abomination in the sight of God. God is constantly telling us that "I the Lord thy God delivered you" --through human instrumentalities. The American Negro has had and still has friends--in the North and in the South. These friends not only pray, speak, write, influence others, but make unbelievable, unpublished sacrifices and contributions for the advancement of the race--for their brothers in bonds. The noblest thing that the Negro can do is to so live and labor that these benefactors will not have given in vain. The Negro must make his heart warm with gratitude, his lips sweet with thanks and his heart and mind resolute with purpose to justify the sacrifices and stand on his feet and go forward-- "God is no respector of persons. In every nation, he that feareth him and worketh righteousness is" sure to win out. Get to work! That's the answer to everything that hurts us. We talk too much about nothing instead of redeeming the time by working.

This was sent to me in an email. Normally, I don't even read forwarded mail much less repost it but I was so fascinated but all of the points that were made by Nannie Helen Burroughs more than 100 years ago that I just had to pass them on. They remain true today. Isn't that just a little bit scary? I started thinking about how far we've really come. What do you think?

Today's Prayer From The Heart!

Bible Verse: Isaiah 53 V 3 - 6

He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hid their faces He was despised and we esteemed Him not. Surely He took up our infirmaties and carried our sorrows, yet we considered Him stricken by God, and smitten by Him, and afflicted. But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us was peace was upon him. We all, like sheep have gone astray, each of us have turned to his own way, and the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.

Prayer:

Loving Father, I thank You this day for the sacrifice of Your Son Jesus. Father for giving me the opportunity to be free of the buden of my sins. For giving me the assurance of Eternal life. Father I thank You. Father, as I think of the loving Jesus who walked on earth, help me never to forget the sorrowing, suffering Jesus who died for me. Father I praise You. Father I glorify You. Almighty and merciful God I worship You. Father I ask a blessing from You today so that I may be a blessing to someone today. Help me to share Your love with someone today. Father I come before You in the name of Your Son Jesus. Amen.

Note: My mother writes these daily! Yep, I got a praying mama and her prayers always come right on time. I am going to add a sign up box to my blog if you would like to be included in the daily Prayers From The Heart! God Bless.

Gerald Levert dies at 40

Gerald Levert, the R&B singer whose hits included "I Swear" and "I'd Give Anything," as well as chart-toppers with the groups LeVert and LSG, has died, according to his label, Atlantic Records. He was 40.

Levert died of a heart attack Friday at his Cleveland, Ohio, home, according a statement from Atlantic.

"He was one of the greatest voices of our time, who sang with unmatched soulfulness and power, as well as a tremendously gifted composer and an accomplished producer," the statement read. "Above all, he was an exceptional human being whose warmth and grace inspired us all."

Levert, the son of O'Jays member Eddie Levert Sr., first hit it big with his sibling Sean and friend Marc Gordon as the trio LeVert in the mid-'80s. The group's hits included the 1987 song "Casanova," which hit the Top Five on the pop charts.

Gerald Levert went solo in 1991. His hits included a duet with his father, "Baby Hold On to Me."

In 1997 he and singers Johnny Gill and Keith Sweat formed LSG. The group's self-titled album sold more than two million copies, and their hits included "My Body."

More recent albums by Levert included 2002's "The G Spot" and 2004's "Do I Speak for the World."

His most recent album was 2005's "Voices."

Gerald had four children.

My thoughts: Gerald was a father, son, brother and friend. He will be sorely missed, not only by those who enjoyed his music but also by those who knew him best. I'd known Gerald for all of my 11 years in the entertainment business. He was a consumate professional with a big heart who treated those around him with respect and compassion. He loved music with a passion but he loved his family even more. My sincere condolences go out to his children, parents and brother.

Ed Bradley of '60 Minutes' Dies at 65

Ed Bradley, the veteran "60 Minutes" correspondent and one of the pioneering black journalists of his generation, died today of leukemia at Mt. Sinai Hospital in New York. He was 65.

Bradley, who had won 19 Emmy awards, covered an incredible array of stories after joining the CBS newsmagazine in 1981, from brain cancer to sexual abuse in the Catholic Church to the high school shootings at Columbine.

He also reported a number of award-winning documentaries, covered political conventions and filled in on the "CBS Evening News" and other programs.

Bradley remained active on "60 Minutes," but he had been ill for some time and underwent heart surgery about a year ago.

Bradley was born in Philadelphia and graduated in 1964 from what was then known as Cheney State College. On the Web site of the school, now called Cheney University of Pennsylvania, Bradley's name tops the list of distinguished alumni.

He taught sixth grade after college, and worked without pay as a jazz disc jockey and news reporter for WDAS-FM radio in Philadelphia. His first news story was covering riots in North Philadelphia, which won him a minimum-wage salary of $1.25 an hour. By 1967 he was hired at the all-news WCBS Radio in New York City.

In 1971, Bradley broke into television as a stringer in Paris for CBS News. In 1972, he became a reporter in CBS Saigon bureau, covering the Vietnam War and in 1973 was wounded on assignment in Cambodia. He returned to the states and the CBS Washington bureau. He became White House correspondent from 1976 to 1978, anchored the Sunday evening newscast and joined 60 Minutes in 1981.

Bradley, who was among the first wave of African Americans to break into network television news, was honored last year with the Lifetime Achievement Award from the National Association of Black Journalists.

Three of his Emmys came at the 2003 awards: a lifetime achievement Emmy, one for a 2002 60 Minutes report on brain cancer patients and for a 60 Minutes report about sexual abuse in the Roman Catholic Church.

My thoughts: WE lost a gentle giant. He was a consumate professional in the world of journalism and beyond. He was admired and respected. He just did so much for so many African-American kids. He was a great role model and mentor. He will be missed.